Self-reorganization

Weird title~

What i mean is: to have a new self. A new point of view in my life.
I neec to "rearrange" myself.
I need to grow stronger,even thou im strong enough right now.
People keep asking me to be softer.
Wow, what a big challenge.
I'd never be soft in my life before. This is really what i need to learn.
" 当个强女人，不当女强人。"
Means I need to keep my feminine characters with me~

I'm thinking how to have a new life.
Of course i know i need to have revolution in my life,but how?
These are the quetions im been asking myself.
What can i do in M'sia? What i need to do to rebuild my confidence??
What does that mean to "bury" my past?
How to bury? How to throw it away???

Now, i can only sure that im gonna read books. I need some books. But which book? I don't know.
Myabe,I just need to have a rest. Having some private time in the house,where i called Home.
Planning to meet my old friends. We known each other for more than 10years.
I dont even need to think,their faces are already present in my mind.
They never leave.
I miss you guys,so much~
Accompany me to go Teluk Batik,alright??
I need sea. I want to listen to the sea.
But Im not sure will i have that much of time staying in Beruas....
I might only go back for 2~3days. So sad.

Looking forward to my brand new self.